One such family was that of our good friend Vassilis Vassilikos who, in spite of his name, is a rabid anti-monarchist. He is also an electronics buff and, inspired by the Nixon tapes, he left his recorder on in the family’s dining room on the eve of the referendum to capture for posterity the discussion on this vital issue. This is what future generations will hear:
MAMA VASSILIKOS: Vassili, children, Papou, Yaya, come and eat. (The sound of footsteps, chairs scraping, and then grunts and wheezes as Grandpa and Grandma take their seats at the table).
PAPA VASSILIKOS: Yannaki, why is your face red? You look as if somebody slapped you.
YANNAKI V.: Somebody did, Papa. I stuck an anti-royalist sticker on a man’s car when he was stopped at a red light. He came out of the car and slapped my face.
PAPA V.: Serves you right for tangling with a royalist.
YANNAKI V.: But he wasn’t a royalist. He said so. He also said that if he wanted a sticker on his car he’d stick it on himself.
PAPA V.: What did you do then?
YANNAKI V.: I stuck another one on his coat as he was getting back in his car.
MAMA: You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Anyway, I’m going to vote for Constantinos. He’s such a nice young man and he looked so sad on TV. Everybody else has come home. Why shouldn’t he?
GRANDMA: After the disaster in Asia Minor, he doesn’t deserve to come home. He should be hanged.
PAPA: Mama, we’re not talking about that Constantinos. This is his grandson — Frederiki and Paul’s son.
GRANDMA: They should all be hanged. Pass me the mustard, please.
MIMICA V.; (reproachfully) Grandma, just beacause Eleftherios Venizelos kissed your hand once when you were a young girl, you don’t have to string up every member of the royal family.
GRANDPA: Stability, tradition, continuity! That’s what a royal family means! Things we won’t have with a President. Glamour, pageantry — leventia! A King leading his troops, sword in hand, on a white charger. What could be more inspiring!
MIMICA V.: (reproachfully) Grandpa, just because you acted the part of Constantine the Great in a school play at Roberts College!…
GRANDMA: Constantine? Hang him, I say, hang him.
PAPA: Mama, we’re talking about Constantine the Great, now, the first Christian Emperor of the Holy Roman Empire. (Then thoughtfully) I wonder what has become of the King’s horse up in Tatoi?
GRANDMA: He should be hanged too. Pass me the moussaka, please.
PAPA: (to his wife) Angeliki, I forbid you to vote for the monarchy! No person in his right mind would vote for a medieval anachronism and I like to think of you as an intelligent woman.
MAMA: I shall vote as I like. We’re a democracy again, haven’t you heard?
YANNAKI V.: I’m sorry to have to say this, Mama, but I agree with Papa. I’d hate to think I have an anachronistic mama.
MAMA: If you don’t shut up, you ‘re going to have an anachronistic mother and another slap in the face at the same time!
MIMICA V.: I can’t bear these family quarrels. I’m going out with Costandino.
GRANDMA; He should be hanged too.
MIMICA V.; (reproachfully) Grandma, Costandino is my boy friend and he is a great grand-nephew of Eleftherios Venizelos, if you must know.
GRANDMA: He must be a nice young man, then. But tell him to change his name and bring me the baklava while you’re up, will you?
